The 4 Crucial Steps to Take for Success in All Areas of Life

Due to our human nature, we tend to avoid and resist the very things that would bring us success.  In fact, we spend more time trying to get the right angle in a selfie for Instagram than trying to figure out what we truly want in life. 

We were born with a subconscious mind completely ready to start recording things as “factual” from Day 1.  It doesn’t try to filter anything out or analyze whether a big fat man in a red suit can actually climb down the chimney…nope, it’s factual because our parents tell us about it and everyone else believes (well, most everyone). 

On the other hand, our conscious mind doesn’t fully develop until around puberty. As adults, we believe our conscious mind is in control, but let me tell you a secret: it’s not. Our actions are almost entirely controlled by the subconscious mind, which has all of the false beliefs (we don’t even know about) that we collected from birth through the present. 

Our subconscious mind is mostly ruled by emotions and instinct, only focusing on meeting our needs and impulses: hunger, thirst, reproduction, intimacy, etc.  It doesn’t analyze, reason or judge…it simply guides us in our actions.

The key to success is getting our conscious and subconscious mind aligned. 

However, this is harder than it sounds as most people aren’t even aware of how their subconscious mind works. When our conscious and subconscious minds aren’t aligned, it can create what feels like an internal battle. 

Also: you’ll never be able to become more successful than your subconscious mind believes you to be.  This is what holds so many people back and prevents them from living their dream lives. 

Below are some examples of how this might show up in your life. 

Example 1: You’re tired of dating idiots and/or people who don’t want to commit.  

However, unbeknownst to you, your subconscious belief is that you’re unworthy of love.  This could be due to an absent parent, an abusive parent, or hurtful words in your past.  On the outside, you might appear super confident and, very possibly, you consciously believe you’re worth it.  Perhaps you even practice self-affirmations to yourself every day, high-five yourself in the mirror, try to choose people who “look good on paper,” etc. 

But if your hidden belief is that you’re unworthy, you won’t find someone who exceeds that inner belief.  Or if you do, you’ll self-sabotage the relationship without understanding why. 

Example 2: You want to lose 20 lbs and start eating healthier. 

Again, unknowingly, your subconscious belief is that you’re lazy.  Perhaps a parent, coach, friend or teacher called you this and it stuck.  Your conscious brain will do all the right things: figure out a work-out that works for you, cut back on sugar, reduce the intake of artificial foods, etc.  You’ll even lay your exercise clothes out the night before and set your alarm an hour early to ensure a work-out before work.  However, when the alarm clock rings, you keep hitting snooze until it’s too late to work-out. You stayed up too late binging Netflix or maybe drank too much alcohol, which are both self-sabotaging behaviors when you’re trying to make positive change.  

Again, until you uncover the subconscious, false belief that you’re lazy, and start building up a new belief, you’ll never perform at a higher level. 

Example 3: You want to create a budget and get better at saving money as you’ve been blowing it on clothes or dining out, etc.  

Consciously, you purchase Quickbooks Online to start tracking your funds, you have the intention to stop eating dinner out, and give yourself a set allowance each week. But when Friday rolls around and your co-workers invite you to happy hour, you can’t resist.  You end up going and spend all of your monthly “allowance” in one night.  

You’re not an idiot and you should not make yourself feel bad about this as, again, you most likely grew up with parents who fought a lot about money (whether you consciously remember this or not) or they talked badly about people who were rich, etc. and it led you to believe that money is scarce, money is bad, and money can leave you quickly, therefore, you might as well blow it on something fun.  Again, these are your subconscious thoughts, so you don’t even know it’s happening inside of you. 

Step 1: Understand and acknowledge this is happening within you.  Knowledge is power.  By willingly surrendering your unhelpful beliefs, you'll begin a beautiful path towards healing. Choose mindfulness and your life will begin to transform in a positive way. 

Step 2: Start observing your mind as an outsider and auditing your thoughts, emotions, and words. What negative thoughts do you find yourself saying the most? How do you talk about yourself both internally and externally? Remember: try not to think about anything you don't want to materialize as that’s how strong our minds are…catch yourself mid-thought and simply say: “Nope, try again.” 

Step 3: Think about your childhood and journal about what you remember: did your parents fight a lot? If so, what was it about? How did people in your household talk about money, love, health, etc.  How was your school experience? Were you bullied? Do you remember any particular person or group of  people saying a cruel thing to you? Start investigating your past with the mind of an objective person collecting data, trying not to get caught up in the emotions of it all.

For example, I’ll never forget in high school when an older boy told me: “You’re too pretty to take seriously, you're not girlfriend material.” That stuck with me for a long time and deep down I believed I couldn't be committed or a "good" girlfriend, so I cheated on all of my boyfriends. Once I dug deep and began examining all of my false beliefs, I no longer think or act this way. 

Step 4: Work with a coach or take a course that’ll help you find and demolish your subconscious beliefs.  Until you do this tough part, you’ll never get to where you want to be.  

We all have the ability to do or be whatever we set our conscious mind to, however, FIRST we need to remove the subconscious blocks and create an upgraded version of beliefs. I have a unique set of questions I ask my clients to get to the heart of their subconscious beliefs, as well as an assessment to find their saboteurs. I have successfully done this with my clients and have seen amazing results with everyone from successful executives to spiritual leaders to depressed housewives.  

Do you need help aligning your subconscious mind with your conscious mind? 

For more information, contact Angela Marie Christian for a free consultation: [email protected]

Angela Marie Christian is a Certified Munay-Ki Practitioner and a Positive Intelligence Coach located in the San Francisco Bay Area. After over a decade in the Silicon Valley corporate finance world, she decided to turn in her spreadsheets and become a mindfulness teacher and share her manifestation magic.  Angela runs a successful online coaching program, as well as a groundbreaking course focused on helping people transform, heal, and align with living their dream life.  She has been featured on Psychology Today, Business Insider, Yahoo, TheList.TV, ABC, Dateline, and More! Angela also produces a podcast by the name of Her Circle.

Follow her on Instagram for daily inspiration: @angelamariechristian